The Inconvenient Truth about Abortion (Part 1 of 3)

People who choose life are not crazy. They’re compassionate.

Churches across the nation devote one Sunday in January to grieve the loss of the innocent victims and to address the issue of abortion. Often times a post-abortive woman will share about her abortion(s), why she had one, how it impacted her, her path to dealing with it, and her healing. Sanctity of life is proclaimed from the pulpits. A song collectively reminds us of the sorrowing sadness of lives not born, not lived, and never enjoyed. I, for one, appreciate the brave women who share their stories to awaken others to the truth about what an abortion is, does, and causes.

I’d like to join them and go against the current of society.

Abortion is an ultra important issue.

We are not dealing with a ‘something’; we are dealing with a ‘somebody.’ To get rid of that somebody involves an aborting, a terminating, a killing of an alive somebody. The real issue is not the woman’s body or women’s rights. That has it backwards. The real issue is about the unborn’s voice, their rights, whether they are given the right to be born and a right to live. Some ‘innocents’ in the womb are denied this basic human right. Life should be an inalienable right for all, though it may be an inconvenient truth.

Abortion is one of the defining issues of our times.

In my opinion, abortion is not a debatable issue. Here’s why.

  • Because of its gravity.
  • Because of what it says about a culture’s view of human life.
  • Because of what it does to its object, community, family of origin, and caretaker of the womb.
  • Because of what it does to those who embrace it.

As a people we cannot have peace on this issue as long as the unborn, pre-born, or even newly born — as New York law tries to define it, are conveniently labeled as non-human in status.

Supreme Court nominees are scrutinized on their position concerning a woman’s right to choose.

Much of the proving ground, posturing, litmus test, media, and national dialogue centers around this area of law, more than all others, the upholding and protecting of Roe vs. Wade. Judicial nominees are judged by their past legal arguments as to whether they honor and follow this law’s precedence or if they are of a contrary opinion.

Unwanted, unborn human beings live in a dangerous place these days.

These little ones will never have an opportunity at life. Their lives are snuffed out before they can breathe their first breath. This is a grave injustice to our most vulnerable, our innocent sisters and brothers. Pressure to abort is huge. Christian people, too, have been marked by this tragedy.  Women cave to the pressure. Pressure is a powerful medium. Sad to say, the option to keep in most public institutions is silenced by the louder, convincing, and prevalent, accepted voices.

This is a national and natural dividing line.

You are either on one side or the other. There is no straddling the divide, although people’s stances can and do change. Don’t assume the person you are talking to is on the same side of the issue as you. I have had that unpleasant experience, when the talker was talking against what I believe and assumed that because I was a public educator, I was in agreement. Realize that many women around you have had abortions.

On a side note.

If you’re sleeping with someone, you better know what she or he believes about abortion before it is put to the test. Many post abortive individuals live with great regret and a stain on their conscience. My heart goes out to them. Society is partly to blame for making it too easy to make the choice to abort, especially when it’s not picture perfect.

Beliefs dictate worldview.

The schism is real.

Pro-Life and Pro-Choice views can never hold hands. Impossible. The abortion debate cannot be settled unless a major shift in viewpoint happens. Your beliefs are part of a much bigger thing called worldview. Worldview reflects people’s beliefs about the intrinsic value and worth of human life. Unless you think these things through and consider that a human being actually dies in an abortion, you may cave to pressure, or not want to be bothered with the responsibility. Such things should not be treated lightly.

Those who view human life as sacrosanct believe all life should be valued.

They believe human life should be protected with the same fervor that we protect that which is valuable to us. They see human life as precious, and they see the life of the woman with child as also precious. They view the right to life as a gift, a human right, and a treasure. Why did society decide that some lives matter more than others? I do not know. But I do know it’s a deception, and it is evil.

However, society lives under a lot of deceptions. 

Societal pressure encourages women to terminate in an unwanted pregnancy, to abort an imperfect fetus in a problematic pregnancy, and to pretend that nothing wrong just happened. It’s an illusion. I know women who stood up to the doctors who wanted them to terminate their pregnancy because of a suspicion. The women didn’t agree to it. And their children are fine. One did abort on the doctor’s recommendation. She mournfully confided in private, in tears, “I killed my baby,” but said in public that she had miscarried.

Several women have told me about their abortions.

I see the pain in their eyes. I’ve had men tell me about their mate’s abortion, after they’d offered to raise the child. They still regret it though it is decades later. Grandparents grieve the grandchildren that were given the boot. It is just too easy to throw it away, get rid of it, kill it, dispose of it, when it isn’t the “right” time, with the right partner, or of the desired gender. Or they are pressured to do what they don’t want to do. There’s the respect they would lose if their secret got out, and so forth.

All life matters, born or unborn.

If you are pregnant and not sure you can keep the baby, think for yourself.

This is about a little somebody. Life is a precious gift that only you can give to the little one in your womb. Be brave. Don’t let yourself be influenced by other voices, including the professionals. Give baby him or baby her a chance. There are people and organizations that will lovingly assist you. Babies can be adopted into loving homes where you get to choose the adopting parents. Every life matters. Take courage. Choose the gift of life.

I end with this.

Not far from where I live is an abortion clinic.

Many of their clients are college women. I think about what’s happening in there every time I drive past it especially on the day of the week when the procedures take place. And I pray for the young women and the young men who impregnated them. I pray that some will choose to not go through with it.

I ask God to awaken the clinicians to the lie that these lives they’re terminating/aborting don’t matter.

May they open their eyes to the horror of what they are doing, instead of excusing it under the guise of its the best thing to do, given the circumstances. I pray for our world so stuck in its wrong thinking that thousands of lives are being affected by the lies believed as right and just, when they’re not right and just. I pray they will realize that every choice has a consequence on their heart of hearts.

I pray their hearts will turn to God.

I hope they will discover the beauty of following the Lord. Christ says, “Come unto me all ye who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” Matthew 12:28. You can count on God to help you. You can count on God to forgive and heal you. God loves you.

To abort or to not abort, is a choice many women will have to consider.

Circumstances and situations seem to dictate what they think they will have to do. Unpack the lies and believe truth. Let me encourage you to do what is best and right, although it may cost you standing or relationship.

Christ gives a stern warning about such things.

He used pictures to communicate truth. Matthew 18:6 – “But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and [that] he were drowned in the depth of the sea.” How much more serious is the shedding of innocent blood.

Resources

Resource Clinics, especially Christian-based centers, offer counseling and post abortive classes to women dealing with the emotional context of their past abortions. Those who teach these classes are caring individuals who will not judge. They care about you. None of us can judge another person’s heart.

Here’s a study book that may be of help, Surrendering The Secret. The author was interviewed by Focus on the Family today. She had an abortion, and immediately shut the door on what she had done. Seven years later the pain of it crushed on her heart. Then she shared about it with a Christian friend and the healing began. For 25 years she’s been giving back as a counselor and speaker to post abortive women. She understands.

How the Pro-Choice Agenda Failed Us: Abortion is Not the Answer

Right to Lifers are marching in Washington. They march because they are on a mission. The mission is to save babies, to save innocents, to save lives, to save baby Americans. Women and Men are marching to create awareness and to stir others to action, to stand, rather than be silent, because all lives matter, native American lives matter, black lives matter, white lives matter, unprotected vulnerable lives matter, babies with disabilities matter. They march because all babies deserve a chance at life and all should be insured the right to be born.

We as a nation are protecting a practice that flies in the face of who we are as human beings. The “right” to abort another human being defies our very right to exist. There is a reason we pledge these words …with liberty and justice for all. Let’s do right by all our children, even the unborn members of our civil society.

-This is an opinion piece-

 I’m so sorry.

Dedicated to all those who forfeited their lives because we failed them.

We cannot fail another generation.

What they didn’t tell you before the abortion

Logic, when streamlined according to what is in your own “best” interest, can be a deception. What they didn’t tell you before the abortion was the truth. They withheld important information about the procedure. They used faulty logic to distort truth. You didn’t get to see your baby’s image on the screen. You didn’t see the fingers, toes and beating heart, the baby sucking his thumb. One baby lives…if the mother says so, and another baby didn’t stand a chance…when they’re a throw-away baby.

Which kind of baby would you want to be?

We have a great ability to distort truth, to justify actions and to white-wash consequences–especially those that gratify self-interest or protect the status quo. We also bury those facts we wish to hide and that no one knows about.  Shame, guilt, fear of condemnation, disapproval, intimidation, fear and a host of other reasons cause us to remain silent on subjects that matter. That is when the louder voice overpowers the weaker voice.

I have been silent too long.

Here’s how the scenario often plays out. An unwanted pregnancy at a wrong time with the wrong person can lead to a wrong choice being made.

To terminate an unplanned, unwanted pregnancy is the choice that some “logically” say is a right choice because of the “wrong” situation. They say, “What about the woman’s future?” They want the pregnant girl, teen, young woman or mother with children to believe that to do otherwise “in their situation” is not in the game plan and would be a wrong choice for them.

Does the unborn baby girl think so?

What about her future? It’s looking bleak.

Do these women have any choice?

Only one person, ultimately, has a choice in this scenario.

The woman with child, the “mother” of the baby, will determine whether or not this child goes to term. The woman carrying the baby in her womb is vulnerable to public opinion (does the public value all life?). She is vulnerable to the opinions of others in her world even if they don’t know because she keeps her news to herself. She is subject to the social mores of social society. She listens to the voice that is speaking loudest, what is being said in the public square, by her teachers and on social mediums. Her man may not “want” this baby. After all, he doesn’t think he needs to shoulder the extra responsibility of supporting a child, or even the constant tie to the baby’s mother. She may feel she has no choice, or she is pressured to get rid of “it.” Maybe she never planned to raise a child. Abortion, for this way of thinking, is the easiest answer to the problem.

But someone will pay.

A baby, a grandchild, a brother, a sister, a niece, a nephew will pay with their life for that woman’s “choice.”

Some choices are best not considered. Innocent lives will never be given the gift of seeing the blue sky. They will never know the warmth of a loving embrace. They will never feel the warmth of the sun on a summer’s day and the delight of watching bubbles float in the air. They never had a chance. Some could care less, and pro-choice advocates are saying that that’s okay.

But it’s not okay.

When did we as a nation quit caring about “some” lives? When did we hide behind terms like Women’s Reproductive Health? Was it when they told us to quit caring about the unborn fetus…in certain situations? That we get to make that choice? The bully in the abortion industry forgot that you have a conscience that will live with you the rest of your life. They didn’t tell you that you are killing your baby. They didn’t tell you that you’re killing your daughter (where are HER rights?). Where are his rights? They didn’t tell you that the abortion is painful for the baby inside of you. They didn’t tell you that when you allow one child to be aborted, you’re likely to have another abortion later on.

It was a cover-up. That baby wanted to live. But someone else didn’t want it to live. The baby was powerless. Some post abortive women are traumatized at the time or relive the trauma when their conscience allows itself to awaken to the fact. It is not just a procedure. Deep inside they know the truth, no matter what the other voices are saying.

They didn’t tell you that part of yourself dies after an abortion.

They lied to YOU.

How do I know?

I have not had an abortion. However, over the years several women have told me about their abortions and a few men have told me about their wife, sister, or girlfriend’s abortion(s). My heart is grieved when I listen to women share the reasons they aborted the flesh of their own flesh. It is always a hush-hush conversation, never to be repeated.

I see the tears in their eyes.

With painful emotion, they disclose their past choice(s) to me. I feel the deep sadness they have felt, which has haunted them for five, fifteen, or thirty years. I hear the lies they believed or told themselves about why they thought it was okay at the time or seemed justified in some way. Others don’t go there. They never wanted the abortion. They caved. Someone put pressure on them or they felt they would lose their partner or reputation or parents’ support. Their eyes tell me a story. I see raw pain. I see regret. I see a broken heart. I see sorrow and suffering. Sometimes I see denial, or I see deadness. I listened to the man who told me about his girlfriend’s abortion and how he begged her to let him raise the child. Despite his pleas, she terminated the pregnancy. The pain is still there some forty years later. Sorrow and regret lived with him all these years hence.

Self-protection, image, or pressure from another person of importance, from their significant other, family of origin or church family, influenced them, or influenced you. A decision was made to abort the baby before it saw the light of day.

A lie was believed. The lie says that the end justifies the means.

This “choice” was believed and accepted as the only and best way out. Sadly, in their inner soul, they either justified the action or they bore the heavy stain upon their heart. Yet I can say, God was there at the time of the loss of life. He felt the pain from this act of perdition with His precious, holy, bleeding heart. Your suffering little one was healed, made whole, and welcomed into His arms on the day the baby bore your shame and hid your guilt.

Shame on the law of the land that did not protect you from the pressure to abort and your baby from harm. The court of laws have protected the mother’s choice but abandoned, condemned, the weakest and most vulnerable members of our society.

Stories that should have been shared are missing. Intimidation? Newsworthy articles about pro-life, walks-for-life, are never covered. Ignored? Grisly atrocities including late-term aborted babies, murdered, stacked in a back room, and found at an abortion doctor’s clinic, barely makes a blip on the screen and is limited to local coverage. Buried? Puppy mills get more coverage than that. Baby parts harvested and sold, down-played by a nationally funded agency, gets minimal outrage and then goes blank. Messy? Other human rights violations get covered, why not this? “See no evil. Hear no evil. Speak no evil?” As I said earlier, we as a nation are protecting a practice that flies in the face of who we are as human beings.

We should be outraged.

But no, the culture of death lives on. And the culture of life is down-trodden, silenced or muted, and ignored.  Bad things happen to people who speak out about this injustice. They are shunned, intimidated, receive retribution (as may I). This callousness toward a sector of human life has bred generations of people who have believed a lie, a lie that devalues the sanctity of human life. As a society, we have chosen to embrace an activity that pierces our collective soul and damages us as a nation. There are two major players here. An educational system, for one, and a social system that have promoted a dual message concerning life. It contains gradient views, a hierarchical view concerning human worth and value. Darwin would have been pleased. The survival of the fittest. There is a bigger picture here than may be realized by our society at large.

It grieves my heart.

There is hope.

I would not have you feel that there is no hope because of the guilt from the past.

There is always hope.

Christ bore your pain and He bore your sorrow. He was there when it happened and was grieving for both you and your sweet little one. Christ loved you with a love that forgives, cleanses and heals. God loves you. Come to Him. He will forgive you. Let Him heal you.

This is not only about terrible sins that are easily recognized. It also about self-righteous pride and arrogance, which are matters of great sin and wrong-headed behaviors. These must be acknowledged and grieved through a sorrowing process.

God must be asked to reveal what are our own areas of guilt. Then we can deal and heal.

Make the right choice.

Let’s spread the word. Every baby has a right to live, even the unwanted ones. There are many people who would love to raise your child if you can’t or don’t have the ability to do so. There are those who will love your child.

Be brave. Be courageous. Be loving. Choose to save a life. Choose to help save other lives. Choose life. It’s the right thing to do.

Your baby thanks you. Other babies thank you.

God bless you.

No regrets.

Dedicated to all those who forfeited their lives because we failed them.

I first penned this post in 2014. I updated and expanded it for 2017 by including recent information and stronger statements. People are haters these days. I expect some will hate me and this article. I have to admit to being intimidated by the loudest voices out there. They condemn people, like me, who do not share their contemporary views. They say we don’t care about the mother, or we don’t care about the child once it is born. That may be true in some instances, but not so in the majority. There are agencies and church people and loving people who are helping mothers who face obstacles like unplanned pregnancies. There is much more to be done, though.

I suggest, to the post abortive woman, counseling at a care center that specializes in helping traumatized women. Many of these counselors share the same wounds as you and are active in helping others find their own freedom. Some of the counselors are post-abortive, as well. My local community has a great resource center, skilled in helping women overcome the pain from their past. They offer classes, where community fosters trust and support. I know some of the counselors. They are warm-hearted and understanding. You need not fear sharing your story with them. Christian-based counselors will have encouraging insights and they will love you. They understand the pain.

Last, but not least, I suggest you contact the greatest Counselor of them all, the Lord Jesus. Like He did with the woman at the well, He accepts and transmits value to all people. Christ heals hearts, and He longs to heal your heart. No one could love you more than He does. Accept His healing grace. When you look at a crucifix you see Jesus with His arms wide open. They’re open for all of us. By His stripes and wounds, you are being healed. Come to Jesus. He awaits you. He will love you and wipe away your tears.