Get the Spiritual Right (Going Deeper with God, Part 6)

Intentional God-focused Living

It’s not as easy as you might think. Human effort plus some Divine intervention may seem like a slam dunk. But it just doesn’t work that way. There’s a whole lot more to it than just implementing a formula. Read on. . . .

GOING DEEPER WITH GOD: LESSON 6

LOOKING IN THE MIRROR: Where am I in the mix?

PREMISE: God made us for relationship.

There’s a problem in the house, the elephant in the room if you will. It seems fairly easy to be a Christian, but it is a lot harder to live as a committed Christian. Talk the talk and it sounds pretty good. Walk the talk is the bigger challenge. 

Look in the mirror. What do you see? If there’s a need for some touching-up, we should get to it and not put it off. But if we don’t care how we look, then there will be little improvement. When we don’t care or are lazy in our walk, then we as Christians are not living up to the name. It should not be this way, we are Christ’s namesake.

So, how does this play out? I’ll share a few of the not-so-nice examples of negative representatives of Christ.

THE PROBLEM

Some wait staff don’t like to serve church groups (I’ve heard this from more than one source). Church groups complain about the service, and they’re known for leaving small tips. (Ouch!) Some people say they are Christians–but they can be difficult. Other Christians are Sunday-only Christians, their belief does not translate into practical out workings in their lives and doesn’t seem to influence their lifestyle choices.

Here are some more unsettling facts. Some Christians are known for being cheap, rude, and overly opinionated. In the public sector, some people have little use for Christians, and these same people prefer to work with nonbelievers. Anyone who has worked for a Christian organization knows how hard it can be for Christians to get along with each other, especially when they have theological differences. I inwardly cringe when I hear someone, newly hired by a Christian organization, speaking with rose colored glasses. I worry their tune will change not too far into it (but I hope not).

Being Christian does not necessarily mean being characterized by the attributes of Christ(ianity), many live more in the flesh than in the spirit. Most likely they don’t keep close enough to the Source, haven’t replenished their spiritual tank, or they have not taken care of some spiritual business that needs attending to including past, personal history.

Am I saying Christians are mean-spirited people? No, I’m not saying that at all. What I am saying is that we as Christians are often blind to our own actions and live with a self-focused mindset far too often. Some have a secular viewpoint in all practical purposes.  “What’s in it for me?” can subtlety find its way into any relationship, home, and church. Thankfully this is not always the norm. There are many Christians who do the opposite. Christians who live out their faith in a sensitive and pure way.

Then there’s this sort of behavior too. “They never apologized to me for what they did.” “What they said wasn’t true. I’ll never forget it.” These comments are based in painful episodes and were caused by residual hurt from unfair or unkind treatment. The bitterness is being carried through the years. It is true, there are those who are critical, who look at what people do wrong rather than what they do right and are quick to tell the rest of us. When we are the target, it can be mighty unpleasant and uncomfortable.

I’m not exempt. I’ve received criticism, and I have also said comments better not said. It embarrasses me to acknowledge this about myself, and I know better. Words and thoughts can flow out as a continuous complaint about the unfairness of it all. “Nothing ever turns out right for me!” I used to think, which came from out my frustration with circumstances and people. Sound familiar? And of course, there are the bigger ones like Christians who take a turn for the worse to pursue an immoral life style or a life of self-indulgence. Those are easier to spot.

Question 1: What gives? What’s wrong in our thinking? Why do we do the opposite of what we preach and believe? Why doesn’t Christianity make a bigger and more distinct difference in people’s lives?

It must be that somewhere in the mix there is a separation between a person’s belief and experience, faith and practice. For those who are fairly comfortable in their Christian practices, it may be a bit of a stretch to believe any of this applies to them; they are sincere and devoted in their Christian living and clear in their Christian world view and practical application of it.

Yet I dare say we all are affected and afflicted as well. At times, we find ourselves enmeshed in this Catch 22, caught between a rock and a hard place and not sure why the victorious life eludes us. I listen to people and their take on topics under discussion and then I find myself wondering where the heart is? what does it all mean? I see a strange dichotomy at work in people’s spiritual lives, and I notice the conflicted view. I want more for them, because I know more can be had. But we can be blind to our own inconsistencies.

I hear Christians constantly nagging their mates, and it bothers me. I witness people of faith being short tempered or impatient on a consistent basis, and it concerns me. I see Christian sisters and brothers telling lies or tweaking the truth, and it disappoints me. I see language that is not the best being spoken without any compunction that the content is an affront or in contradiction with their faith, and it causes a sense of shame in me.

QUESTION 2: Have you seen this same problem–Christian inconsistencies, duplicitous behavior, living with a double standard, played out in the church or a Christian organization? How did it make you feel? Why did it bother you?

Why is this? Why am I bothered by these actions? Do I think I am better than them? Worse yet, am I judging them? That’s not it, decidedly not where I’m coming from or the point I am trying to make even though it does sound sort of cranky and “white-washed.” I realize I have no business telling people how to live their Christian lives, that’s between them and God, and I’m not their minister; and for sure, I am not the “spiritual” police, making sure people do what they’re supposed to do. That’s not what I am about.

I also know God works in peoples lives and brings them to a place of dealing with their life according to His ways, their backgrounds, readiness, and their own spiritual growth. What may be sin for me, may not be sin for them in many of the gray areas. So, why? Why talk about these things?

It bothers me for a different reason altogether.  Christian behaviors are telling. Even children are known by what they do. Selfish or rude behavior tells me where the person’s heart is. Behavior may display tracks of unconfessed sin, unhealed hurts, spiritual infancy, or self-centered thinking. But most revealing is an underlying callousness towards the living things of God and a lack of respect towards God.

Pure faith, that is tried and true, is easily seen in those who love and serve God in such a way that it even colors their speech and their decisions. Pure faith sweetens the dynamics in their close relationships and infuses the characteristics of God’s ways into their hearts. Somehow they’ve managed free themselves from the contamination.

We live in a sin-stained culture, and it has left its mark on all of us. Like a truck stuck in a mud bog, spinning its wheels but unable to get grip and any kind of traction, we simply can’t break free of this murky madness until we intentionally choose to do so, then go for help, do the hard work, and clean up the mess. This can be through a loving intervention done God’s way and with His help.

The truth is, we can’t possibly love God with all our heart, mind and soul and at the same time continue to treat our Christian brothers and sisters, family members and friends in selfish, or unforgiving ways while keeping a running score of their infractions and injustices towards us. When we harbor resentments, we know there’s a problem in the house (in our spirit).

I find myself a bit skeptical as I watch my Christian brothers and sisters at spiritual retreats and special church meetings. I wonder to myself if the emotional high they are experiencing will impact their lives in the long term. Will their renewed desire for God be long-lasting? My skepticism comes from a place deep inside me. Lasting change will take lasting effort to effect the change.

I have watched these things, true renewal is more than an emotional experience. It takes hard work to change from living for self into becoming who God wants us to be, not into who we think we should be. The two are quite different. We each have our own path to spiritual transformation, and no two look alike. We must remember this and allow others the freedom for God to work in them as He wills.

For internal renewal to be real and permanent, it requires a commitment to change and a desire for something more in our spiritual life. The desire for something long-lasting, dynamic, life-renewing, and real–something we can only find in God when we seek Him with our heart, mind, and soul–is something we doggedly pursue. It has a lot to do with surrendering our way to God and God’s ways.

In an earlier lesson, we looked at our need for God and His desire for an intimate relationship with His beloved children. They, in turn, realize they have a corresponding inner need and a growing capacity for God. We saw that a desire for “being,” the state of real, living relationship, is far more important than service, which is seen in our acts of “doing.” This may cause a reversal of thinking as we shift our focus from our Christian works to following Christ first. In its pure form, Christian service is an outworking of the Christ-life within us.

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Next in Series: THE SOLUTION (Going Deeper, Part 7)

Conversations with Emily (4)

The conversation continues between “Emily” and me. I continually seek to draw her out and to be of help. She mentions the book we are reading in common, “Jennifer’s” book. We continue to dialogue almost every day.  I’m starting to enjoy it by then.

The Girl is Vulnerable

September 19, 20**

9/19, 9:49am
Me
Have you read her book?  Could you identify? How old is your son? I have five kids, age range, 16- 31. Parenting forever! I get tired. In the desert times we gain wisdom, if we can keep bitterness and disappointment from crushing and corrupting us. At least that’s my experience. It may be different for others. Sweet promises are yours today. Keep looking.

9/19, 9:50am
Emily:
I have finished the first read through.
My son just turned 14 last week…I share a bit in Jennifer’s book but I’m not sure you’re far enough for that part yet. Depending on where ur at exactly u may have already read some of my story though.

9/19, 9:56am
Me
Possibly. Just got printer ink, so I’ll print the rest and get to it ASAP. I’m getting off-line for a couple of hours. Talk with you later.

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September 20, 20**

9/20, 5:57am
Emily:
starting me AM in tears before even getting to work…pray i can hold it together and get something done today

9/20, 7:04am
Me:
Yes, I will.

9/20, 8:22am
Emily:
Thx

9/20, 8:29am
Me:
I’m going to be your prayer partner. I always go to prayer around this time and I will pray for you daily. TGIF. Norma

9/20, 9:23am
Emily:
And now I’m crying at work…partners implies both of us praying for each other though. What can I be lifting up on ur behalf?

9/20, 9:32am

Me:
I will get back to you on this. There are a couple of things.

9/20, 4:05pm
Me:
I have a health issue that has made life miserable for years and years. It keeps me from being as active as I’d like to be, even in ministry. It’s an intestinal issue. Also, I struggle with time management. Need victory in this. Thanks for asking and for your prayers. Did your day improve?

9/20, 4:08pm
Emily:
I didn’t make it thru work without crying and had plans to bring a friends and her family dinner tonight since she was having cancer treatment all week but she is still in the hospital and husband was scheduled for second shift so that opened up my evening. It really was a God thing though. Couldn’t really afford picking up pizza from their fav place and then taking my son out to one of his fav place plus the gas to drive the hr there and the hr back. I’m can see Gods hand in it all

9/20, 5:07pm
Emily
And a friends dad finally died today…she has been on this emotional roller coaster of today-might-be-the-day for the last two months
And JUST found out a friend from high school is losing her husband to cancer. Two young kids are watching their daddy slip away from them as the cancer devours his body.
I’m sorry I’m such a downer…I will be praying for u.

9/20, 6:11pm
Me:
My goodness. When it rains it pours.

9/20, 6:12pm
Emily:
sorry for dumping

9/20, 6:13pm
Me:
Silly you. Nope. I feel that you wouldn’t bring it up if it wasn’t impt.

9/20, 6:18pm
Emily:
have ya read anymore of “Jennifer’s” book

9/20, 10:58pm
Me:
I’m reading it right now.

__________

September 21, 20**

9/21, 5:04am
Emily:
I’m having a hard time reading my story in print on the pages in front of me. Let me know when you’ve finish ch 6

JUST PLAIN SCARED

I don’t know why Emily asks me again if I have read more in the book we will soon be helping launch, Jennifer’s book about women healing, but I do wonder about it. Then Emily tells me that she’s in it. Imagine my surprise, I wasn’t expecting that. I’m in for some more surprises along the way.

The conversation continues.

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LINKS

>next post:  It doesn’t matter anymore:  Conversations with Emily (5)

<previous post:  An unlikely friendship:  Conversations with Emily (3)

|<<first post:  A woman at risk:  Conversations with Emily (1)

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I welcome your comments on this post. Thank you.