The year was 2003, the month was February. I was recently divorced after a twenty-one year marriage. I had liked being a married woman, a wife to the man I loved, and part of a two-some in name and identity. When I found myself “Suddenly Single” it was hard on me. It was like I lost part of who I was. When you are a two-in-one unit, your life revolves around “us,” not “me.” I found it difficult to adjust to being single and life as a single mom. Fitting in no longer seemed as easy. At church it was a couples world. I tried to establish a lunch for the singles one Sunday a month. Somehow it just didn’t catch on.
I needed something to keep me active and to look forward to. I thought about a book dinner club with women. So I tested the waters. It would be with parameters in reading material, a span of nonfiction and fiction Christian books, not Christian lite or Christian heavy, but somewhere in-between. And for the most part, I didn’t want us to read romances. I thought we should enjoy the books and learn in the process.
I decided to start the Ladies Book Dinner with women I knew. A flyer was put on the church bulletin board inviting women who liked to read. At my place of employment, I invited a teacher friend and an instructional aide friend. I invited a few women I knew in the Forest Ranch community. The first meeting would be at my home with me providing the meal and the first book for us to read. It was on a Friday at 6:00 p.m. I didn’t know who would come.
The women arrived. Two came down the hill from Forest Ranch, five from my church plus an elderly parent, my mother and me. The warmth of the wood stove filled the living room as we chatted and got acquainted. I asked “getting acquainted” type questions and the ladies did some talking about their interests and lives. Then I distributed an Elizabeth George book Loving God with All Your Mind for our first book, which we would discuss at the next meeting.
Fifteen years later, five of the original women are still attending. A couple of years ago and after I quit teaching school we changed it to meet at lunch time. Now it is called Ladies Book Lunch. My mother is no longer able to participate but she would if she could. The intervening years have seen women join up and women drop out, and one leave for a while and then return. A couple of times I suggested maybe it’s time for us to quit, but the women want to continue. That says a lot.
I think what keeps us rolling is we enjoy our time together, and we like most of the books we read, and lastly, we care about each other. We have lived a lot of life during the years. There’s been cancer, divorce, kids’ weddings, house-warmings, new babies and grandbabies, loss of mates through death, health issues, family issues, hopes, dreams, retirement, celebrations and so forth. We tend to stay on the bright side, knowing these times are meant to be uplifting. Why does it work? You could call it love. I love my ladies, and they love me and each other. And that’s a very good thing.
A side note: The book the ladies are holding in the picture is When a Woman Finds Her Voice, a book I helped launch in 2013 and written by Jo Ann Fore. I taught this book as a study with my church ladies in a morning group and for an evening group. We saw barriers overcome and hearts mended. I’d recommend a woman use this book to lead a study only if she has met Jesus in the intimacy of close relationship and can field difficult questions and will invite the Spirit of God to lead and enter with truth and love. It takes a heart that’s become tender.
Until next time,
Take care of yourself
