Every chapter in When a Man You Loved was Abused offers useful insights into the character and destructive nature of sexual abuse. The author himself was an abuse victim. He later became a minister, missionary, writer, and advocate for abuse victims. I read this book for my own information but not as a support person for a victim of abuse. However, it indirectly spoke to some of my issues that injured me, which caused grateful emotion in me because of its helpfulness. One of the gifts Cec Murphey gives through this gently written book are tools for ‘being there’ for a support person of an abuse victim. I am in just such a situation with a person who has other troubling issues and have said to myself “I don’t know what to do” for I felt out of my league. I sensed ‘advice giving’ to be the wrong approach. From my reading I now know it would have been. I do know others affected by past abuse or living with someone who has its imprint in their past. I am glad for a resource I can recommend without reservation should the opportunity present itself. What I learned from this book is quite helpful. It gives guidance that will directly influence conversations to come. I highly recommend it for anyone who lay counsels. It contains proven insights applicable to sensitive situations. School teachers would benefit as well. As I was reading I thought of former students who had been molested, who didn’t feel loved or wanted. They struggled so. A second grader told me that no one loved him after he made a Valentine’s Day card–he drew a cracked heart, his words–with a little boy crying in it. I knew he believed it was true. From Murphey’s personal first-hand account along with the inclusion of other men’s stories, the wisdom presented in its content opens the door to greater understanding of damaged emotions and how they can be healed. Well written.

FOR WRITERS ONLY

DEAR CECIL MURPHEY:  YOU ROCK IT!  I’m a struggling writer intent on shaping my writing to conform to industry standards. I have learned a lot in the process. That part’s all good. This endeavor to write it right, though, has created an ever-growing angst in me.  Along the way in my effort to be well-written I’ve spent an inordinate amount of time in rewriting, editing, and altering my manuscripts.  It’s cost me my enthusiasm. I’ve lost some of my inner sparkle, freedom to express, heart speak, lively outlook, and below-the-surface passion of my writer within. I noticed the creep and wondered what was wrong with me and why freshness had left my writing. Dullness set in. Inner conflict developed. I doubted self. Unleash The Writer Within brings clarity to the underlying issues. Now I have insights. I can see what’s gone wrong, what’s been lost, and what I need to do to get my writer within out of this rut. Your insightful instruction along with giving me permission to be me allows me to sing my own tune. Fear is part my problem. I’ve been afraid on many fronts. My inner critic thrives, alive and well. More often than not it tells me to get out of the heat and to stop trying so hard. For too long I have remained stuck without any way out.  This voice of mine is sensitive to the fear of being misunderstood by my target audience. I’ve been too intimidated to speak with boldness on areas dearest to me. I’ve not been sure if I could take the heat or defend my statements properly. I so identify with your book’s subject matter. You help me see the big picture. Thank you for this generous and enlightening gift.  By allowing yourself to be stretched, vulnerable, and honest with your story, you empower other writers to unleash their own authentic voices. I appreciate how you drill down until key elements expose the essence of credibility for the author community. Thank you for writing Unleash The Writer Within. You offer a great service to writers, and you offer hope to me in my own writing journey. Grateful,  Norma L. Brumbaugh