A Woman at Risk
Late one evening I noticed a short post on social media. It stopped me cold. The young woman sounded like she was in trouble. Is she suicidal? I wondered. The tone of the brief comment was despondent. We communicated a couple of weeks but with sparse comments. I was concerned for her but didn’t know how to gain her trust. I kept trying. Then this.
The Conversation Begins
September 16, 20**
9/16, 8:25pm
Emily:
everything is not well
9/16, 8:32pm
Me:
What’s up?
Emily:
having a hard time
9/16, 8:35pm
Me
Anything I can do? I’m a good listener. Here’s a hug for now (Emily).
9/16, 8:36pm
Emily:
pray i can get some sleep
9/16, 8:42pm
Me:
Ok, I will do that. As soon as we stop talking. God fixed my computer for me. Really! Its hard drive crashed last week. I was praying yday and God said He fixed it. Today I turned it on and it was back to normal. Doesn’t usually work that way! “Father God, bless my sweet friend. Help her to rest like a baby. Most especially help her to feel carried in your strong arms, you love her so much.” Amen. God bless you.
Norma
9/17, 12:o9am
Me:
Good night. Let me know if there’s anything else. I’ll check later on.
September 17, 20**
9/17, 3:13am
Emily:
Thx
9/17, 7:05am
Me:
GM my friend, Were you able to sleep better? I hope so. Still praying that God will uphold you. Blessings …
JUST PLAIN SCARED
Emily and I were in a newly formed social media group as participants in a book launch for a Christian book about women overcomers, but we were not yet acquainted. I sent her a brief private message. She acknowledged it but didn’t invite further discussion. I responded with a sentence to let her know that I was there and willing to listen.
Thus began ongoing stilted conversation with us communicating a couple of times per week. It was a hard go. I didn’t know to what degree she was struggling or the source of her angst. In time she began to trust me. We got behind the mask to the source of her pain-filled emotions. It was complicated and raw. Slowly I began to share some of what I have learned through my own path to healing. It morphed into a friendship.
Unfortunately I am unable to retrieve our first private messages. Trust me, we didn’t say much other than “How’re you doing?”
In this post, I show a replay of hers and my messages to each other. This time, however, different than in our prior communications, she takes the initiative by contacting me first rather than our established routine of me checking to see if she is okay. It was this message that made me realize we were making head-way, it wasn’t only me supporting her, but she was allowing herself to be vulnerable by being willing to reach back.
The communication between the two of us continues in the next post. I begin to get to know Emily a little bit better. She has lots of secrets, the troubling kind.
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LINKS
>>Next post: Scared and alone: Conversations with Emily (2)
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Oh, Norma!
Years ago, when I was still teaching, I had a suicidal and armed student in my office. He had returned to school to get a Masters’, and found himself out of his depth…and losing his family.
After disarming him – rather abruptly…we chatted for several hours.
To make a long story short, he did eventually graduate, family intact, and made a success of his life.
It was not ‘on me’. It was between him and God. I merely broke a few bones in his hands, and took away a .45.
As a PS…the conversation we had segued into a talk with a priest (Catholic)…the ‘proper authorities’ were never contacted. I mean, why? Nothing happened. So he pointed a gun at me, big deal. Not that it hasn’t happened before.
The important part was getting the dude off the ledge. It was about him, not me.
Wow! I’m glad you were able to disarm him and also get through to him. Talking several hours was life-giving. It’s encouraging to hear how his life turned around. Thanks for sharing.